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cheer up for surviving the past week
back to spamming of jokes, as i see that this place need some updating to liven the place up. =)
Logic Amongst The Sciences A mathematician, biologist and physicist are sitting in a street cafewatching people going in and coming out of the house on the other sideof the street. First they see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house. The physicist says: "The measurement wasn't accurate." The biologist concludes: "They have reproduced." The mathematician says: "Now if another person enters the house, it'llbe empty again."
Oops! Astronomers were excited this week at having isolated a brief soundwhich occurred immediately before the Big Bang. Apparently, that sound was "uh oh."
Space Monkeys NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an astronaut. They trained them for months. Then when they thought they were ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready to send them up into space.
As the moment came closer NASA's mission control center announced, "This is mission control to Monkey One. Initiate!" At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle's engines ignited and the shuttle took off.
Two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, "This is mission control to Monkey Two. Initiate!" At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle separated from the empty fuel tanks.
Another two hours later mission control announced, "This is mission control to the astronaut..." At this the astronaut responded "I know, I know. Feed the monkeys and don't touch anything."
Kid's View On Science
- You can listen to thunder after lightening and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it you got hit, so never mind.
- When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms. But when they broke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions.
- When people run around and around in circles we say they are crazy. When planets do it we say they are orbiting.
- While the earth seems to be knowingly keeping its distance from the sun, it is really only centrificating.
- Most books now say our sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into a sun in the daytime. - A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.
- Many dead animals of the past changed to fossils, others preferred to be oil.
- Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they're there.
- Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun. But I have never been able to make out the numbers.
- We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on. - I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.
- Rain is saved up in cloud banks.
- Cyanide is so poisonous that one drop of it on a dog's tongue will kill the strongest man.
- Thunder is a rich source of loudness.
- Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound.
- It is so hot in some parts of the world that the people there have to live other places.
donthc bitched at 1/19/2008 11:43:00 pm
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